i think, if there’s anything i’ve learned since late october is that’s its not good for me to seek out. seek within instead. a dear friend today told me that lightning struck years after a similar brutal end of a relationship. it resonated. in the past, I have sought out love or connection rather than turning inward.

my focus has rightly been on my darling children. both of them. it’s hard as a single parent, juggling multiple households and it’s been hard not to beat myself up over that. but it’s true in some fashion, put up the guards, focus on the kids, focus on myself which is the hardest thing to do for me. i had dear, dear time with 3 beautiful friends today, watched my son grow and embrace his wildness, had a wonderful talk with my fierce daughter last night. i need nothing more than my children, the sound of the ocean, myself.